If you’re making the trip to the north east, good luck to you.  Aubergines it is.

A trip to White Hart Lane is rarely an enjoyable experience at the best of times, let alone when the hosts rest their forward line, appear not to be terribly fussed about the whole thing, and still win at a canter.  Still, at least these hardy souls had some vegetables for company.

Jamie Simons makes his BHaPPY debut with a fine specimen.

Ed and Nick Corble report that “eat the leek” is used by Shakespeare as a euphemism for “putting up with insulting treatment”.  Which sums up a trip to White Hart Lane succinctly.

Frances Lynn was annoyed to be sat next to a Spurs fan; pic taken while contemplating whether to beat him to death with said leek, or to use it in a more “creative” manner.

Jeff Bartrop looking a bit unsure about the whole thing.

Don Fraser; out of focus, but unbowed.

We came, we saw, we ate grapes and left a little sheepishly, but only a little.  Here’s da pics…

Alan Ambler cradles his wares lovingly as the stadium fills up behind him.

Don Fraser is, as ever, confident that we’ve got it in the bag.

Frances Lynn goes for the red option; quite right, there was enough green around already.

Yours truly. 

Sorry that this is a bit late.  Been rather a hectic week, all in all.

 Leeks  tomorrow please…

Those making the long trek to Plymouth should remember to pack yer grapes… preferably sour, in honour of a cheap Suffolk hack who’s had too much lazy publicity already, and so won’t be namechecked here.

Our local correspondent informs us that we’re cluttering up the front page of the free Watford Observer once again. A report on lucky carrots at West Ham, it appears…albeit with an entirely warranted reprise for the pic of Toddy with a lemon, an image that sums up the project better than any number of words.

Enjoy.

After months of desperate searching, it was almost inevitable that the search for a lucky vegetable would end with the humble-but-mighty carrot. If only we’d tried it sooner, we’d be nudging into the Champions League places, all of that bluster from Young Adrian would seem like over-cautious understatement, Collins John would’ve paid us to jump aboard the bandwagon, and I’d be able to find the bugs in this blasted Actionscript. Still, perhaps it’s not too late….

Ed and Nick Corble win bonus points for including someone dressed in a carrot costume in the background.

Match of the Day pundits Frances Lynn and Farzana Chaudry with some local produce, purchased at the Queens Market in Green Street, apparently the oldest street market in London. “Cor blimey, guvnor!” and suchlike.

Frances’ nieces Madeleine and Amelia decorated their carrots for their first away game…and very much enjoyed the result, given that their dad is an Un’appy ‘Ammer….

Nigel and Cate, also with some suitably smiley carrots. Behind, a woman apparently engaged in some pre-match bird-watching. Or perhaps she’s just looking for Gareth Williams, who seems to have disappeared.

Back from his travels, it’s Matt Rowson!

Back from his travels, it’s Ian Grant!

(Hands up who wishes we were still doing BSaD instead of this nonsense…? Yeah, well, tough…)

It would appear that most of you were much too busy fluttering your eyelashes at Tommy Mooney for any five-a-day fun…although we note and applaud Frances Lynn’s attempts to get the great man to take part. Anyway, to business….

Pete Bradshaw, apparently sitting on the same row as some very, very small people.

Chris Stride, Sarah Anderson and a spud-shaped steward for an excellent bonus point.

Jeff Bartrop, who is to be applauded for finding a potato that appears to have some sort of unpleasant disease (might it be bird flu? OHMYGOD, IS IT BIRD FLU? SAVE YOURSELVES! RUN FOR THE HILLS!), along with Celebrity Big Brother contestants Frances Lynn and Farzana Chaudry.

Cate Lynn - sister of Frances - and her fiancé Nigel, looking suitably excited by a visit to the Theatre of Dreams (TM).

No sign of any mango(e)s, but plenty of apples and pears to celebrate our unlikely win at the Boleyn….

Five-a-day legend Frances Lynn appears to be holding two apples. However, the BHaPPY judges have examined the entry in some detail and are satisfied that the item on the right is indeed a pear. No further action is required.

Hazel Cooper, adding to the five-a-day fun by sitting in front of someone who appears to be sucking a lemon. (Is that harsh? I’m not sure.)

Graham Cooper expressing the sheer joy of eating a pear. The apple had already been consumed, apparently. That’s the spirit. Try it with the potatoes tonight….

Wisely taking no chances, Ben Young appears to have arrived around midday to be sure of the perfect photo op. Good work, that man.

Dan York claims of his wares that ‘these are genuine east London fruit - purchased from the finest (and only) grocer on Prince Regent Lane E16, “Bubble and Squeak”‘. It’s not quite Mark Fowler’s fruit ‘n’ veg stall, but it’s a good effort nonetheless.

* Proof, if it were needed, that it takes more than a poxy English degree to get the hang of this rhyming slang business.

It was going to be a beetroot, but that might be a bit challenging within the timescale. Extra points if you manage it, though. Otherwise, your vegetable of choice is the humble potato, preferably one that’s been lurking in the back of the cupboard for a fair while. If in doubt, your local greengrocer will be able to oblige, I’m sure.